Dororthy Parker Quotations

Dororthy Parker

If all the girls who attended the Harvard-Yale game were laid end to end, I wouldn't be surprised.

I'm never going to be famous. My name will never be writ large on the roster of Those Who Do Things. I don't do any thing. Not one single thing. I used to bite my nails, but I don't even do that any more.

Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.

Razors pain you; rivers are damp; acids stain you, and drugs cause cramp. Guns aren't lawful; nooses give; gas smells awful; you might as well live.

Summer makes me drowsy. Autumn makes me sing.
Winter's pretty lousy, but I hate Spring.

That woman speaks eight languages and can't say "no" in any of them.

That would be a good thing for them to carve on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgement.

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of their tires.

The only ism Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.

This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.

When you swear you're his, shivering and sighing,
And he vows his passion is infinite, undying,
Lady, make a note of this, one of you is lying!

You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think.